Tim's First Deer!

Tim recently decided he wanted to start hunting- partly for fun and partly for the free meat we'd hopefully get.  He's long awaited shotgun season and Friday was his very first day of hunting.  He got up at 4am and hit the deer stand early, with his brother-in-law Doug in a blind a hundred yards away.  Late in the afternoon this big antlered beauty strolled right up to Tim's deer stand and one slug to the spine took him down.  

I was hanging out in Tim's dad's house with Papa Joe and the kiddos and heard the shot; I hoped it was Tim.  A couple of minutes later Doug came in the house and asked for the 4-wheeler keys, reporting that Tim had gotten something!  I jumped off the couch and slipped on my shoes.  Let me pause here for a second to adequately set this disaster-of-a-day up.  I had gotten my hair cut earlier in the day and, ladies, you know that your hair always looks best when your stylist uses all of her whiz-bang spritzers and straightener.  I treasure having a decent hair do for the 12 hours that follow any hair appointment.  And, I was wearing my white Merrell shoes my mom got me for my birthday as well as my favorite purple puffy vest.  Okay, so I dash out of the house wanting to get to Tim quickly.  I had no idea where his stand was, and his dad's property is vast and heavily wooded.  After 10 minutes of Marco-Polo style husband finding, I caught a glimpse of his orange vest and started running toward him.  I also heard Doug on the four-wheeler, but then the engine quit and I saw Doug on foot, too.  We both finally reached Tim and saw that he didn't get just any deer, he got a magnificent 10-point buck with a beautiful symmetrical rack!

Tim and Doug dragged the deer into the close-by field and I asked Tim if he was going to field dress it.  He said, "Umm, I don't know how to do that!" Thankfully, Doug is an Anatomy & Physiology professor at the local JuCo and knew exactly what to do.  As Doug skillfully navigated the process, he asked me to go get the 4-wheeler.  So I started running (knowing it was pretty far away from us) and here is where the disaster began.  I had to run through a recently disced field that was terribly wet and the mud began building up on my shoes, eventually to the point that I had several pounds of mud caked on my feet.  It was like my feet morphed into cinder blocks in seconds!  

Upon reaching the stupid dad-gum four-wheeler, I realized it wouldn't start.  I called Tim and he suggested using the pull cord.  After nearly tearing my rotator cuff it became clear that the pull cord wasn't up for being pulled.  I called Joe and, like a genius, he suggested I get it out of gear.  Turns out, when you take a four-wheeler out of gear, it suddenly becomes very easy to start.  I pulled up to the deer and Doug had gone back to the house to clean up.  That left Tim and me to hoist the deer onto the back rack.  Yeah.  That wasn't happening.  We waited for Doug to come back and the two of them worked together to get it lifted up.  

Ergo, problem #2: the deer was much longer than the rack was wide, so Tim had to hold the head up as I drove, running along side the four-wheeler.  The field was so rough that I had to keep the four-wheeler going fairly fast or it would stop in the deep ruts.  Poor Tim was struggling to keep up with me while holding to really heavy deer head, and I couldn't help but giggle as he continuously got tripped up in the mud, his cover-alls, his boots, etc.  We were at the bottom of a steep hill and I knew we'd never make it. So, I convinced him to sit backwards behind me and hold the deer, but that meant I had to stand and drive at the same time.  I was doing the best I could, but dern it, I got us stuck in the mud.  I got off and told Tim I'd hold the head if he would get us un-stuck.  He was rocking the four-wheeler back and forth and I was holding up as much weight as I could to alleviate the pressure on the back axle and VOILE! it shot out of there like a jack rabbit out of a fox hole.  But remember, I was holding the deer head and we were in mud.  My shoes were long ruined, but I was still hoping to make it out of this whole ordeal alive.  I yelled to Tim not to stop and to keep going as fast as he needed to so we didn't get stuck again, but I just couldn't keep up.  Mud was flinging everywhere, I had blood on my vest, jeans, shoes, hair, everything!  

And then something really unfortunate happened.  The buck's legs got caught in one of the tires and the deer flopped right off the back of the rack and into the mud.  Tim hopped off and the look on his face said I wasn't the only one wondering how on earth we were going to get the deer back up on the rack.  I mentally told myself that my 4 months of CrossFitting had prepared me for this very moment.  I closed my eyes, imagined my coaches were there reminding me to squat deep and explode the hips, engage the core, and take a huge breath right before lifting.  Tim yelled "ONE-TWO-THREE!" and we lifted.  Nothing.  We didn't life anything because that heavy carcass just stayed right there.  I wanted to collapse in the mud and call for a CIA-helicopter extraction.  Tim said that wasn't an option and to put my big girl panties on and get 'er done.  The second try was successful, but I knew I couldn't keep running and holding the stupid deer head that I was sure had doubled in weight in the last 5 seconds.  Tim reached around and held an antler and I carried both sets of legs and he dragged me through the muddy field and we eventually reached his Dad's driveway.

Papa Joe was out there with his camera and the cousins were jumping up and down cheering as they heard the roar of the four-wheeler.  The sight of the house was like a tall glass of cool water in the middle of a scorching desert sun for me.  I have no idea where it was coming from, but I'm sure I heard the Chariots of Fire theme song.  When we reached the shed, I collapsed.  Coughing, gagging, wheezing, I peed a little bit on my pants, and gasped for air praying Jesus wouldn't let me die like this in front of my kids.

Look at him.  He's all like, "Oh yea!  Everyone look at me here with my clean clothes and my happy face!  I feel great because I didn't just get dragged through 14 miles of rough wet soggy terrain or have an asthma attack and ruin my new hair do with deer blood!" 

Eli thought it was pretty awesome.  He wanted to roast the whole thing on a open fire and have a feast right there. Emmanuel petted the deer and ate a piece of grass she pulled out of it's hooves.  Tim led the kids and I in a prayer of thanksgiving for God's provision of the deer.

It turned out to be a great weekend.  Jesus answered my prayer and didn't let me die while the kids watched on in horror.  We took the deer out to my parents' farm and my dad and little brother, Flip, joined in the fun.  My dad showed me how to skin it and we all worked together to cut the meat off.  Saturday my grandparents came over and we set up a processing pack-line and ground up/packaged/froze 50 pounds of venison for the winter!

It brought back a lot of memories of my childhood when my parents, brothers, and myself would work together to process deer every winter.  God is always good to provide us with all that we need and much of what we want!

To all the hunters out there, I hope your weekend was as fruitful as ours, but I hope your venture was not nearly as difficult!  Remember to always praise our God for his goodness!

In Christ,

Gwenny<><

PS- I'll be getting Tim the book "Field Dressing Deer for Dummies" for Christmas and he'll be getting me some good boots.

Our Komen Discussion on Facebook

Today I tweeted, "Super disappointed that #Komen bowed down to it's bully. #PlannedMURDER"

I still stand behind my original statement that I am disappointed that Komen reversed a desicion that was based on company policy because Planned Parenthood and its supporters backlashed. In a world where media, teachers, and parents are constantly fighting bullying and empowering individuals to stand and do what is right, a humongous coporation backpeddled because they were bullied. However, in retrospect, I realize that my hashtag at the end was harsh and did not promote the love that God calls me to always live out.

Don't for a second think that I'm siding with Planned Parenthood. I will never support them, recommend any of their services to any person I know (even the free breast/PAP exams, etc). I will never give a single dime of my money to Komen and have not in the past because I knew they supported Planned Parenthood. While I am fully aware that Komen's money to PP is used only for the exams and screenings, I cannot in good concious allow the money God has blessed me with to be used by an organization who also offer abortions, which according to the PP website is "a safe and legal way to end a pregnancy."

I beg to differ. Abortion might be legal (which makes me ashamed of our current ethical status of our government), but it is NOT safe. How can a procedure that ENDS A LIFE be safe? Really, I don't get it. Most supporters of abortion use the argument that it's a woman's choice, and that the pregnancy is unwanted. Again, I disagree. That baby IS wanted! That beating heart, dreaming mind, blinking eyes, kicking legs are all wanted! Perhaps not by the woman carrying the baby, but by many, many people and by the God of this universe! God says in His Word that He knows us even before we were born and that he intricately knit us together in our mothers' wombs!

I recently joined a group of adoptive moms in my area and it has been such a blessing and an enlightening expereice! These women talk about the relationships they have with their children's birth mothers and what a blessing it is for the children, the adoptive parents, and the birth parents! When women and men choose to let a child LIVE and make the difficult decision to share that child with another family, it blesses everyone involved! I've read many accounts of women who have had an abortion and regretted it for the rest of their lives. It affects them emotionally, physically, and wrecks lives (visit http://www.gargaro.com/regrets.html to read some of these devastating stories). I will never understand or agree that abortion is okay in any circumstance.

Now, to address the comments that ensued once my tweet hit Facebook. One of my friends who is not a Christian posted that PP does save lives by detecting cancer in women. I agree with her that it is a great thing to catch cancer early and properly treat it; I think every person would agree with her on that!

And to my Christian friends, thank you for standing up for the truth that we live by. We all know, down to the core of who we are, that aborting a "fertilized egg" is ending a human life, killing a future crayon eater, cutting off a live that would bring so much joy and love to a family! But let us be careful to share the knowledge of truth in love. Remember that we were once bound for the same eternal destination that those who haven't chosen Christ are! It is only through love, forgiveness, and grace that I have been set free, so it is my responsibility as spelled out in God's Word to share the good news of Christ, His truth, and His love to the world.

I'm not telling you to be quiet about God's word, not at all! BE LOUD about God's truth, but do it in such a way that we don't turn people off! We will never convince someone that choosing Christ is the best life possible if we are pushing them away with rudeness. Please don't think I'm coming down on anyone, I'm not. I need this lesson more than any of you. To be quite honest, I didn't feel a twinge of pain when that abortion doctor was killed a year or so ago. But God did. God loved that man and wanted him to repent of his life of carreer-sin.

I guess this is post is just to thank you all for sharing your diverse perspectives. I appreciate the healthy and thought provoking discussion. But remember, Christ followers, we are held to a higher standard. We cannot expect orange trees to produce apples; those who don't know He who is Truth to live by that truth. Let's keep loving them until they want what we have- and that's the Truth that sets us FREE!!

Thank you, friends! I really do appreciate what each of you contributed to our conversation!

A Lesson from a Daytime Show, er I mean the Old Testament

So along with millions of other Americans, I'm reading through the Bible using a 365 Day Planner (download YouVersion for all you smart phone users, it's a great resource!). I'm still in Genesis and I've read the whole book a zillion times, but tonight God showed me some big stuff that I had not seen before!

Most of you probably know this story, but let's recap really quickly. Abram and Sarai wanted children REALLY badly. They tried for decades, but couldn't have children. Abram had a discussion with God in which God revealed that He would build a great nation of peoples through Abram's offspring. Sarai got impatient and sent her servant Hagar to have sex with Abram and thus we have Ishmael. Abram mistakenly believed God would build the great nation through Ishmael, but God clearly stated that Abram and Sarai would have a child of their own (unrelated note: could you imagine that conversation? "Uh, no, Abram. It was not part of my plan for you to go and sin to fulfill My plan through your wife's scheming ways of adultery..."). God called out to Abram, reminded him that God is God and He is Almighty, and because it was such a significant moment, God changed Abram's name to Abraham and Sarai's name to Sarah. One year later Sarah gave birth to their son Isaac, through whom the great nation would be built. Hagar and Ishmael continued to be a part of the family (twisted and disfunctional as it was...but hey, everyone has their quirks!) until at a great feast celebrating Isaac, Sarah found Ishmael teasing Isaac, so she (Sarah) demanded that Abraham kick them out of the family. With hesitance (because Ishmael was his son), Abraham gave them food and water and sent them away, removing Ishmael from any future inheritance. (Check this story out in full in Genesis 16, 17, & 21)

Now, I can't help but feel sorry for Hagar and especially for Ishmael! She was forced to have sex with her master's husband, carried his child, and then was hated by Sarah because Hagar conceived so easily when Sarah could not. And poor Ishmael, he was born into this soap opera! BUT, here's what God showed me tonight in my study time: Sometimes we are born into less than desirable circumstances, but our decisions can make or break us despite those circumstances!

Take another look. Why did Hagar and Ishmael get excommunicated? Because Ishmael was mistreating his little brother! Not because he was the bastard child of the mistress, but because of something he chose to do!

Now, think about how this applies to us. Some people are born into really unfavorable circumstances. Alcoholism. Poverty. Generations of failed marriage. Drug addiction. Lack of education. Slavery to sin. GOD OFFERS HOPE! He is freedom FROM sin so that we don't have to play the cards that life sometimes deals! We just need to choose Christ with our hearts, confess Him as Lord with our lips, and we are FREE! (See Romans 10:9-10)

Friend, what have you allowed to be your fate? Don't let statistics tell you what you will be! Break free from that mold and be who God wants you to be!

Celebrating,

Gwenny

Christmas cards

I ordered our Christmas cards on Shutterfly today and I can hardly wait to get them!

Photo Card

View the entire collection of cards.

Marriage and Surprises

I'm so proud of my husband. Like, really, really proud. He works hard to provide a great life for the kids and I. He loves the Lord and loves our babies. What more could I ask for? Yes, he still farts and often leaves an empty toilet paper roll just sitting there...waiting to be changed...by someone other than him. My point is that, for the most part, he's the most awesomest dude ever. Second to Jesus. But He set the standard pretty high, you know, so being second to Him is saying quite a bit.

He drives a car that was graciously given to us a few years ago, but the ol' thing has seen better days. So over the summer I got a wild hair and decided I was going to get a few extra jobs and buy him a car for Christmas. And not tell him.

I made curtains. I cut grass. I made more curtains. I cleaned houses. I made yet some more dad gum curtains. I did some landscaping, painting, organizing. I made clothes, baby slings, and yes, some more flippin' curtains. And I hung Christmas lights, not knowing exactly how an extension ladder worked. Turns out the death warnings are supposed to be right side up, lest ye ladder come falling to the pavement. But that's aWHOLEnother blog post.

But, it was really weird. I found myself loving Tim more as I completed all the tasks knowing that I was doing all these odd-jobs so he could drive a nicer car. Even when I thought I was going to fall over and die in triple digit heat working outside, there was a sense of, "Man, I really love my husband."

So for half of the last year I've saved, worked, taken on extra sewing jobs, and stuck it all in a secret savings account that I may or may not have threatened the lady at the bank not to tell my husband about. There was some hard work involved on my part, but this whole surprise gig would not have been possible if not for the incredible generosity of a couple that hired me to work for them. My favorite part is that through the process of trying to make enough money to get Tim a newer car is that I came out with some pretty awesome new friends. Sorry, I'm getting off-topic, but it was important enough I had to mention.

Enter in the dilemma. After several weeks at my new top-secret job, Tim got suspicious and asked me what I was up to. It seems that if I come home covered in mud and sweat from doing yard work at aforementioned job some people tend to think it a bit fishy. So I used vague and loose phrases to communicate something along the lines of, "Just shut up and don't ask me anything else or I'll punch you square on your left cheek because I'm tryin' to surprise your nosey self!"

Tim assumed and I didn't correct him to think that we were going to take a vacation around Christmas time. I avoided lying as much as I could and when he asked, "Are we driving or flying?" I responded with, "Oh, it's a lot of driving. A LOT of driving." Truthful? Yes. Totally honest and forthcoming? Perhaps I have room for improvement. There were many moments of "Oh snap, how do I handle this?" but for the most part, I did okay thinking off the top of my head, which doesn't happen to be one of my spiritual gifts.

So a couple weeks ago the best car dealer in the WORLD (Contact Jim Baer at www.cardinalcredit.com if you're looking for a good pre-loved car) called and said he found the perfect car. I knew I couldn't hold it in any longer and wanted to reveal the surprise NOW!

Ergo, we have today. I woke up with a nervous stomach brought to me in part by yesterday's stomach flu with support from a great deal of anxiety about how he would respond to such a surprise. Now I realize that my husband, unlike me, does not carry around little packets of confetti to toss out at exciting moments and doesn't have Inspector Gadget-like pom-pons that break loose from his palms just in time for a cheer. That said, I was still hoping for a "HOLY COW!" or "WHAT ON EARTH?!"

I hummed "Eye of the Tiger" as I saw Tim pull into the church so he could (wink, wink) "help me carry some stuff out to the car" (wink, wink). So I walked him right past our car, he turned and said, "Uh, the car is right there..." and that, my friends, is where we pick up:

Can I just say that during the last several months when I was shoveling gravel on a ridiculously humid July day, I imagined how he would turn a cartwheel when I magically unveiled his sweet new ride! When I sewed through my ever-loving finger for umpteenth time, the pain was soothed with visions of Tim sweeping me off my feet, twirling me around like Beauty and the Beast, spouting sonnets of what a wonderful surprise I had given him!

But, he just stood there. Looking at me. And my co-workers that had gathered at a second story window of the church to witness the glorious moment shrugged and said, "That's it? Hmph." and returned to more exciting things. Like stuffing envelopes.

But, hey! That's what marriage is all about! How boring would it be if we were all the same? In that moment, I had to rush back inside for my next class but after school I came home to find a grinning-ear-to-ear guy who had apparently just come out of shock because his crazy wife just sprung the surprise of lifetime on him, and he spoke right to my heart. He wrapped me in that unmistakable "Come here, Baby!" embrace, I gave him that never misunderstood "Um, the kids are still up" look, and I said, "I have SO many stories to tell you!" We plopped down on the kitchen floor and I back-filled him on all the times I had to use my cover story, on all the crazy jobs I'd done, and how I'm pretty sure the new accounts lady at the bank didn't believe my story. He threw his head back and laughed, asked so many questions that started with, "So, that time when..." and I said, "Uh-huh! Yep!" Most importantly, I reminded him how proud I am of him and that I'm super glad to be his sidekick in ministry and in life.

Then he forced us all into his new car and we drove to see our parents to show it off. Eli cried half the trip because he wants the old green car back. Awesome.

Crazy Life?

A couple weeks ago I called my mom hoping that she would open her mouth and comforting words of wisdom would flow out as I eeked ever so close to the edge of completely losing my sanity. As usual, she did her typical SuperMom thing and spoke to me exactly what I needed to hear. She's always great like that!

Anyway, the story goes a little something like this: I was bathing the kids (Tim was not home at the time), Eli was being a bit of a domestic terrorist, Emmanuel was a tad sensitive, and I was not handling the combination well. When I called my mom, my voice had that "come-get-your-grandkids-now" tone, and she responded in a calm, soothing voice. I'm not sure if it was intentional, but it was super helpful. She reminded me to be patient with them, not to raise my voice, and to let them be the fun loving and goofy kids they are. She then said something that has reverberated in my mind many times since: If I could go back and do it all again, I'd do it very differently.

She was and still is a great mom. I remember her taking us to the park when we were pretty little and using wax paper to slicken-up the slide so we would soar down it (once I flew off the end and landed in a puddle and had to ride home in a laundry basket so my muddy hind parts didn't smear on the back seat). One time in high school I was the only girl on the cheer squad that didn't get a Christmas gift from my cheer pal so she snuck into my locker the next day and left me a gift (better than any other gift the rest of the cheerleaders got, to boot!). And more times than I can count she has come to babysit Eli and Emmanuel and when I get home the house is clean, dinner is simmering on the stove and my kids faces are dirty from playing at the park (I wasn't kidding when I said she's SuperMom!).

But back to the point, she said she would go back and do it all differently because she wanted to do a better job. When I look back at my life, there isn't one thing I've done that I am totally happy with how I did it. I wish I would have been more kind and loving to others in high school. I wish I would have made better decisions in college- I know I missed out on what major God wanted me to have, I'm pretty sure I didn't go to the college He wanted me to go to...really, I could go on and on. But my mom's statement scared me for one reason. I CANNOT get my job as a wife and as a mom wrong. I may have messed up in the past, but I CAN'T get this one wrong! I don't want to look back when my kids are going off to college and think, "Boy, I just wish I would have done better. I wish I would have been more patient when they were splashing me with water that one time when I was getting them ready for bed when Tim was gone and I was grumpy. I wish I would have played with them more and barked at them less."

So, my whole point (to myself, the rest of you probably already get it) is that I need to be quick to love my kids and slow to become angry at them (see James 1:19-20 for a scripture on this). Yep, we have a crazy life here at the Lawson Dude Ranch, but it's a great one! My husband works hard to provide a good life for us, he loves the Lord and treasures us. Eli is crazy smart, laugh-out-loud funny, and as handsome as the day is long. Emmanuel is sweet, she's a momma's girl (which I LOVE), and is a sneaky little turkey! We have supportive family, great friends, and a church like no other. What more could I ask for?

After I got off the phone with my mom, I got the kids jammied-up and put in bed. I went back downstairs to hop in the shower and pulled the curtain back to find colorful foam letters clinging to every square inch of where I wanted to be standing. But I just smiled, arranged them to remind myself to love the moment, and snapped this picture.

A time for everything...

Let me first say "Thank you!" Thank you to all of you who have supported my family by being a part of the world's best clients. You all have allowed me to be at home with my babies and earn toward our family's income. If not for all my clients (and those of you who encouraged me, gave me good ideas, and informed me that some of my ideas weren't so good) this three year journey would not have been possible.

In Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 the Bible says, "For everything there is a season, a time for every matter under heaven. A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silent, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace."

So, in short, there is a time for everything. I know, my paraphrasing skills are out of this world. There was once a time to learn them, and now is the time to use them. Okay, sorry. Moving on.

Three and a half years ago we moved here to Maryville and Eli was just a tiny little sprout. I desperately wanted to stay at home with him, but we were at the point that we had to have more income than what Tim was bringing in. So, I dusted off my sewing machine (the same one my mom learned to sew on in seventh grade!) and turned out a few items. Thankfully, other people liked them (or pitied me) enough to buy them and little by little God grew my business. There were hard times and harder times, but I would not trade my experience as a designer and seamstress for anything in the world! I got to make things for very famous clients (one of which you all know as the STL Cardinal who broke the record for homers in one season!) and had the honor to make things for children in need. Best of all, I got to be a part of YOUR family by making clothes, bedding, curtains, costumes, and just about anything you could think of!

Just as with most things in life, there always comes an end. And after much talking, praying, talking, a bit of crying, talking, some fighting, talking, and a little more talking, Tim and I have decided it is the best move for our family for me to close my business, Stitches and Seams By Gwen.

I am in the process of closing my Etsy shop, but will leave up my website for 3 more months to honor my commitment to the Mommies-To-Be registered with me. I will also be glad to service my local clients on a limited basis through Christmas of this year, but please know that my turn around time will be much slower since my focus is turning from sewing to being the best dern Mommy I can! And of course, all current orders will be completed on the time schedule I originally gave you.

I shared our decision with a few clients today at the market and they all said the same thing, "But WHYYYYY?!?"

That's a great question, and let me share my heart with you.

Over the last three years, I went from sewing a few hours a week to sewing 40, 50, even 60 hours a week. It went from something I enjoyed doing while Eli was napping to something I was doing while Eli was watching TV all day or I was staying up until 4am regularly to do.

Don't get me wrong, I still love doing it (most of the time) but it has become more of a burden on my family than the blessing of having the income. God has graciously provided a new way for me to earn income by teaching at a WONDERFUL school, so it seems that, in the words of my very best girlfriend, that "God is providing a way to do what He's calling me to do."

First and foremost, I am so thankful God allowed me to have this amazing opportunity to learn so many things through my business and that I got to meet so many great people. I never would have met my sister-from-afar (who I've never actually met in person) Christy Bozeman, I wouldn't not have gained my market sister and partner in crazy living Lori Rehg. Life just wouldn't be the same without my entire Goshen Market family! And I will never forget the kindness of the Tie-Dye lady from Edwardsville that packed up my booth the morning Fred died and I couldn't return to the craft fair.

I'm beyond thankful and indebted to my mom, Karen, and grandma, Blanche, for taking my frantic calls and talking me through fixing mis-haps, broken machines, threading the surger (GRRR!), and picking me up off the floor when I'm ready to throw my sewing machine out the window. Without them, I would have been out of business ages ago!

And I would be remiss to leave out my life partner, my soul mate, and my Skip-Bo enemy Timbolicious. He's made fabric runs (literally, 11pm fabric runs), taken box after box after box to the post office, and accompanied me to more craft fairs than any man should have to tolerate.

My knuckles are white with tension as I desperately try to hang on to my business, but I'm slowly seeing that life at the Lawson Dude Ranch will improve ten-fold if I choose to close this wonderful chapter in life and begin a new one. Gosh, perhaps I'm blowing this out of proportion. It sounds like I'm dying. Sorry guys, this is a big deal to me. Just hang with me. I'm almost done.

I just want to thank all of you one last time from the bottom of my heart. You all are such a blessing to me!

Oh, and one last thing. Is there a change God is calling you make? Is there something BIG (or maybe just big to YOU) that you could/should/would do? If so, give it some thought, a big ol' heap of prayer, and seek some wise counsel. You never know what God could be working on without you knowing it!

I love you all!

In Christ,

All Sewed Out

PS- Is it too late to delete this post and let's go back to the way things were 5 minutes ago?? Oh dear, this is not going to be easy.... Deep breath, Lawson! Deep breath!